Circa 1995 AD, four years sober.
They said in meetings; don’t make any big changes when you first get
sober. But I was four years down the road so my wife and I bought a new house across
town and moved in. Our old washer and dryer made the trip but they were so raggedy
that I decided it was time to replace those too.
So I did that at Sears and they delivered a new washer and dryer to our new
home and connected them. Later that day when
my wife came home and saw them she said, “Oh you got an electric dryer.” “So,” I said. "But I wanted a gas dryer; don’t you remember we talked about this
once? Gas dryers are cheaper to run and they dry your clothes better.” Right then was the point when I would have
flown into a rage during the old days. By old days I mean four years earlier or
even four weeks earlier. But I held back,
I had to.
I felt the rage building inside but instead of
exploding I said okay; I’ll look into it. I didn’t fly off into a rage this time
because of a little change that had occurred inside of me. I don’t know if it was humility, or faith, or
just a desperate desire to be sober that changed in me. But I am so grateful that I didn’t
explode. I called Sears the very next morning and explained to them exactly what had happened. To my surprise Sears said, “No problem we can
switch it out for you for just the price difference for a gas dryer.” As it turned out there was only a $50 price difference so I quickly agreed to it. The very next day Sears swooped in and changed
out the electric dryer with a gas one and connected it up at my house. I couldn’t
believe that the solution was so simple. I would have made the problem
into a much bigger one, had I not been sober.
I would have gotten very angry and I
would have stubbornly forced her to
keep that electric dryer. She in turn would have been frustrated and very unhappy
with the electric dryer. But
yet, miraculously instead my wife was happy with her new gas dryer and I felt at
peace. I really do prefer peace in my life, I have always wanted inner peace and this was
one of the instances when I actually received it.
I shared this electric dryer story at the very next recovery meeting I attended and everybody had something to say about it. Everyone sharing seemed encouraged to know that this sobriety thing can actually work, against all odds.
We all concluded that we must make a conscious effort to choose peace by
resisting our natural tendency; to insist on having our own way. This was a turning point for me and a lesson I would do well to remember even today twenty years latter. This is true because I still have that same natural tendency to boil over and spoil everything instead of choosing peace. Hopefully we can all grow in this and enjoy peace in ever increasing measure.
